Well, the last post I wrote was very depressing and I apologize for that. But that is exactly how I was feeling at the time. Since then I have been to Oklahoma and back and had the chance to visit my family and reminisce about things past. The services for Daniel were beautiful. The service was the most meaningful, heartfelt, personal service that I had ever witnessed. It really brought closure to Daniels death. It really doesn't take away the heartache, but at the same time as my Aunt Christie (Daniels mom, and the strongest woman alive) said, "You can't wish someone out of heaven." A lot of people, even during these tragic times has reminded me that people who take their own lives do not go to heaven. I think that under these circumstances, which his suicide was not out of hate, he did go to heaven. He wanted to be with God. He had suffered so much and with his final note which read "The Lord is my rock, my fortress, my deliverer, in whom I take refuge..." Psalm 18:2, Daniel did go to heaven.
On another note, I was very excited to meet my niece Rhiannon. She is absolutely adorable. I think that she looks a lot like my sister and a little like Chris her husband. I think that we connected right away. I already miss her. I enjoyed the 3 days that we had and wished that we had more time. But duty calls. I also spent some time with my cousin Sarah and her family along with many others whom I wished that I was closer to.
Now, the recovery has begun! I left for Laughlin on April 1st got back on Sunday the 5th, flew to Oklahoma on Wednesday the 8th, returned from Oklahoma Sunday the 12th and now here I am recovering from the 24hr flu. I think that my body was punishing me for not getting any rest at all. But I don't have any plans for this weekend (the first time in 3 weekends) and think that I am just going to relax.
Also, thank you to all of you who called, wrote and send cards. You really don't know how much that meant to me. I love you all and am lucky to call you friends.
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3 comments:
Hey hun! I'm so glad to see you, but I wish that I was reading happier news. We love and miss you tons on the board and hope to hear from you soon! God bless and your family will be in my prayers.
Hey girlie! I'm so sorry about your loss. I hope you and your family are feeling better these days, and I'll be keeping you all in my prayers. There is no doubt in my mind that Daniel is in heaven, and shame on anyone who tells you otherwise.
<3 afterglow
Life is crazy sometimes. And I am glad that you got caught up on your rest.
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